Discussion in 'Community' started by squir1y, Jun 9, 2014.
The Energizer bunny has been arrested.
He was charged with battery.
So many villains are over the top. We need more that are...Low-key.
Why does a chicken coup only have two doors? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Did you hear about the movie patron who was abusing the popcorn? He was charged with a salt and buttery.
Why are elephants large, grey, and wrinkled?
Because if they were small, round, and white, they'd be an aspirin.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
How do you make a clown cry?
You kill their family.
No, I'm pretty sure Jerry Lewis definitively answered that question, and it's "make him complicit in genocide."
why is there no aspirin in the jungle?
because the parrots eat 'em all
What did the one elephant say to the other elephant while looking at the naked man?
"That's cute, but can he pick up peanuts with it?"
What do you call sleeping lumber?
Q - How do you catch a polar bear?
A - Cut a hole in the ice, and put peas around it. When the polar bear goes for a pea, kick it in the ice hole.
Your momma is so stupid she thinks Nickleback is a refund.
Did you hear about the movie who used too much seasoning on the popcorn?
He was charged with a salt and buttery.
Did you hear about the short psychic who escaped prison?
She was a small medium at large.
Elephant was walking through the jungle when he bumped into mouse. He said "mouse, why am I so big, and strong, and muscular, and you're so small, and puny, and weak?"
Mouse looked up and said "I've been ill"
why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
because demons are a ghoul's best friend.
A Rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender sees them ad asks, "Is this some kind of joke?"
Shakespeare walks into a bar, the barman says "oi, you're bard".
Somewhat appropriate as I am currently backstage in a production of Midsummer Nights Dream
Working, or just pucking about?
Why are clowns so grumpy in the morning?
They sleep funny.
Why are clowns so offensive to others?
They smell funny.
I'm playing flute/Thisbe. About to do the play within a play
That's hilarious. Fun part. What a delightful way to spend a Sunday afternoon.
When I get the video, I'll upload my suicide scene