Count The Cost (what if Amidala and Obi-Wan were married)

Ah. Only a woman could write that! It's beautiful. Keep going!

 

Can i get on yet?

 

I couldn't get on this afternoon. Here's some more.

 

They were standing just inside the doors that lead to the balcony. It over looked the ?Private Royal Garden?. A centuries old Lilac tree grew near the balcony. In all his travels Obi-Wan had never seen another one. Bushes yes, an actual tree no. As far as he knew it was the only one on the planet. It was said that the rest were destroyed in the ancient battle that had divided Gungan and Naboo. Obi-Wan noticed a slight movement in the tree that wasn?t caused by the wind.

"Ami, look. The caterpillars are spinning their cocoons."

"Has it been a whole year?"

A year. A year ago, after an especially dangerous mission Master Yoda had sent Obi-Wan and little Qui-Gon home to Naboo. Sent? The Jedi master had practically picked Obi-Wan up and put him on the transport.

"On Naboo at least one month you must stay. Your apprentice I will watch."

Anakin had bristled at the idea of being left under Master Yoda?s supervision for nearly 6 weeks. Anakin had wanted to see his Padme too. Master Yoda had insisted and Obi-Wan had finally relented. Since Anakin had not been raised in the Temple it would be good for him. All Obi-Wan would have to do for the next 6 weeks was take care of one 5 year old little boy. He would never have believed any one who tried to tell him just how phyically demanding that would be. The boy was his son. He was a Jedi. How did parents who weren?t Jedi do it? How did parents who had more than one do it? Twins ran in Amidala?s family. As first time parents the prospect had excited them. By the time Obi-Wan reached Naboo with his son he had lost count of the times he had thanked God little Qui-Gon wasn?t twins. Now he sadly wished he had been.

The first day on board the transport the child was constantly getting into places he wasn?t supposed to be. Engineering, the bridge, maintenance corridors ?. Finally Obi-Wan had given up the idea of keeping little Qui-Gon out of such places and just taken him. That way he could make sure the boy didn?t get hurt. The crew though they liked the young prince appreciated not having the extra?"help".

The first day home little Qui-Gon had discovered the caterpillars spinning their cocoons. The child refused to leave the balcony. Finally Obi-Wan had told the sleepy child the caterpillars were sleeping it was time he slept too. Little Qui-Gon was asleep before his father could get him undressed. On the morning the butterflies emerged Obi-Wan and Amidala were awakened by squeals, giggles and cries of "Marmmie, Papa come quick." They knew from the direction of the sound that little Qui-Gon wasn?t in his bed chamber but on the balcony. When they got there they saw their son balancing precariously on the balcony rail surrounded by butterflies. "Living Force Papa. Living Force Marmmie." Later Amidala pulled Obi-Wan aside.

"I thought you locked that door last night?"

"I did Ami, I did."

"Then how did he get out here?"

"I asked him while you were getting breakfast. He said he heard the butterflies calling to him. He wanted to see them. When he couldn?t get out the door he remembered that at night I push the latch up and in the morning I pull it down. So he thought about it and the latch came down."

Little Qui-Gon had not only heard the force but had been able to use it.

"Ben that?s impossible. He?s only 5 years old."

"Improbable yes, but obviously not impossible."


One beautiful day Obi-Wan and Amidala took little Qui-Gon to the farm where Amidala grew up. Her mother still lived there. After lunch little Qui-Gon was "helping " his Grandma clean up. The waste disposal in the kitchen was being obstinate. Grandma pressed the activate button several times. Obi-Wan was coming over to see if he could fix it.

When little Qui-Gon said, "Grandma when our ?sposil? doesn?t go at home MY papa say?s # % & @ ."

Amidala?s mother stared with her mouth open at her grandson for a few seconds. Then she glared at Obi-Wan and said, "We DON?T say that word IN THIS house."

She pressed the

 

What dream? What dream?

This was so touching. I knew it had to be written by a woman. Men just don't get it with the emotion stuff, do they?

There's so much emotion in this story that I can relate to. (Not that I've lost two children.) But hoping for twins, and then being glad you didn't get two. And rather facing 20 Togorian pirates than the mother-in-law.

Keep going, R U Sidious! This is a rare work indeed.

[This message has been edited by Jane Jinn (edited 02-26-2000).]

 

What dream? Did I miss something? (Gets ready to reread entire thread.)
Before I do that, I just want to say that I check on this thread daily and enjoy all your posts Ms. R U Sidious. I can't wait for the next ones! =)

 

The "DREAM" is in my 2/18/00 post. When Obi-Wan wakes up screaming "NO" "He closed his eyes swallowed and said, "Yes Ami I?m fine. It was just a bad dream." ??.The same one he?d been having since little Qui-Gon died. The child in danger on a cliff calling for Papa. The only change in it was since the miscarriage there were 2 children calling for him. Something dark would knock them over the edge and he would wake up screaming???" I'm sorry I didn't make it clear. I've never lost children either but I love kids. I've taught 2 and 3 yearolds in Sunday School for almost 20 years. 12 of that my husband has helped me. Plus I have a neice and 3 nephews that are all grown up now.

 

Hi,
my first post.

I am really liking this story, good work.
I have a fairly good idea where you may be going with it, ie: who the two children calling to Obi Wan may be.

Eagerly awaiting more.

 

"Ben?"

"Yeah."

"What about Anakin? I know you may not want to talk about him or what happened between us. But we need to if we all are going to get past this."

Obi-Wan sighed, " I know Ami, I know. But I honestly don?t know what to do about Anakin." He walked over to the balcony rail, leaned against it and looked out over the garden. "The council told me before my last mission they were considering making him a knight because of his actions in the last battle. They want my opinion as to if he is ready or not. Master Yoda is against his being knighted because of his age. He thinks it?s to soon to tell how strongly Anakin is rooted in the Jedi Code, But, I was the same age he is now, when I got my knighthood because of the battle with Darth Maul. I was raised in the Temple. But I studied under Qui-Gon for only 12 years. Anakin wasn't raised in the Temple but has been my Apprentice for 15 years"

"Are you going to recommend he be knighted?"

"Just a few days ago I was thinking of saying yes, but now I don?t know."

"Oh, Ben, it?s because of me, isn?t it? I?ve taken his chance to be a knight away from him."

"Ami it?s not his only chance to be a knight and it?s not just because of you. It is because of his ??" Obi-Wan stopped, searching for the right words.

"?his affair with me, a married woman. Not only that but the wife of his Jedi Master. The one man who can take away his dream of being a Jedi Knight." Amidala began pacing up and down the balcony. "Ben, please I beg of you please don?t let what happened influence you against Anakin. It was my fault. I led him on. I should have seen he was thinking of me as ???? thinking of me as someone other than the big sister-friend I?ve always been to him. I was the adult in the situation. Did I ever tell you the first time I met him he said he was going to marry me some day?"

Obi-Wan shook his head.

"Well, he did. I laughed at him and told him he was just a little boy. In so many ways he is still that little boy I met 15 years ago."

"If your trying to argue for his being knighted calling him a little boy is not a very good argument. He is not a little boy any more, You? KNOW,,, that better than I do, now." There were bitterness and sarcasm in his voice.

Amidala stared at him in shock, then lowered her head and thought ?another part of the cost. My husband isn?t made of stone. I deserved that remark.?

After the words came out of his mouth Obi-Wan couldn?t believe he had said them. He rested his face in his hands for a few minutes. When he took them away he said, "I?m sorry you didn?t deserve that remark. What I mean is Anakin is not a child anymore. You can?t protect him, Ami. Anakin is a young man and he is responsible for his own actions. Impetuous actions have always been a problem for him. Not thinking through the consequences of his actions. Yet, I?ve never seen anyone as fearless as he is in combat. It wont be long before he surpasses me in ability with a light saber. He has such a strong connection to the living Force. He learns quickly. I usually have had to tell him how to do something only once. But he?s weak on the theory side of things. About the over all picture of things. And to be honest with you I don?t know how strongly he believes in the Jedi Code. If he doesn?t believe in the Code he should find something else to do with his life."

"Ben, no. Please, help him don?t let Anakin?s dream die. He?s suffered so much. He?s in so much pain. He?s kept it hidden from both of us. I never knew how great it was until we got so close these last few days. Then he let me feel it. I was in pain too and I thought by sharing our pain it would make it go away. All it did was make it worse. It took away our trust of each other. We all lost an innocents we will never have again. It will be a long time if ever before you will be able to completely trust me alone with him again. For that matter when will I trust myself alone with him. It happened I can?t change that. I don?t want it to happen again. I don?t want to give hi

 

I'm still wondering what Anakin will do. Will his actions still cause the downfall of the Republic and Jedi Knights? You've hooked me, R U Sidious.

 

<blinks as I slowly regain my senses>

Whoa, after sitting in front of my computer so long, I feel asleep, and look what happened: JC went down for repairs, plus we've had 3 posts from our awesome author. Well while I am still here, I better just sit some more until you post again! Keep up the good work!

 

This to tell the love of my life and my inspiration Snookie HAPPY 39TH BIRTHDAY 2/27/00. love,
Snuggie

your my Jedi Knight

 

"I?d never seen Anakin so angry as he was the day he took me to the Senator?s quarters. I had to talk to him a long time before he calmed down. First I was afraid in his anger at you he would get hurt. Get in an accident or something on the way back to the Temple. Then I was afraid he?d hurt you. Lost in your sorrow you wouldn?t be able to defend yourself."

"Ami, I?m a Jedi Knight."

"Yes, but I was still worried about you."

"Even after what I said."

"Even after what you said. You?ve told me how powerful Anakin can be in battle when he uses the Force. I think I saw some of that power that day. It made me afraid for both of you. I?d just lost my 6 year old son. I didn?t want to lose my husband too." She came over and stood next to him. "I still don?t."

"Oh Ami, how did you manage to marry such an idiot."

"You may be an idiot but your my idiot." she teased.

"I?ll take that as a complement Your Highness." He knelt down on one knee.

"You may arise Sir Idiot"

It was an old joke between them. Back after the Trade Federation War and before Obi-Wan ever allowed himself to think of Amidala as anything but a "kid".
When Obi-Wan thought Amidala was putting on too many Queenly airs, He would call her "Your Majesty" or "Your Highness" and kneel before her. She would give him permission to "arise" and call him "Sir ______" whatever came to her mind at the moment. They laughed together. Then Amidala turned serious again.


"Listen Ben, when Anakin came out of the bacta he was still angry with you for yelling at me. It took a long time before he believed me. That nothing you said could have caused me to lose the baby. I made him talk to the Healers. I gave them permission to show him the medical records on the miscarriage. Finally he saw the truth that there was nothing anyone did that caused it. Nothing anyone could have done to prevent it."

"Since you told him you wouldn?t go away with him he can?t be very happy with me now."

"I suppose not." Amidala studied him a few moments. He was lost in his thoughts. She had a pretty good idea what those thoughts were. If the situation were reversed, if Ben had been unfaithful to her, she would be wondering the same thing. She also knew he would never ask what he wanted to know. "Ben, it wasn?t better with Anakin."

"What?"

"The sex. It wasn?t any better with Anakin. Different, yes, better no."

"Ami, I didn?t?.." At first he was little shocked at the bluntness of the statement. Then looking at her he realized something. "Ami,I think one of our greatest assets is knowing what the other is thinking so often. It?s also one of our biggest problems. I expect you to just know I love you. I forget to tell you or show you."

"I know. I forget to tell or show you that I love you too."

"Ami, did we become so predictable with each other that we lost our passion for each other? Is that why you needed Anakin?"

"The sex with Anakin was?Oh I really don?t know how to explain it. It was draining some how, Maybe because we weren?t supposed to be together. It felt dangerous."

"The danger wasn?t more thrilling?"

"No it frightened me. I think the fear is partly what woke me up. Made me rethink what I was doing. Take a look in the mirror. I didn?t like the woman?the girl I saw. I realized that?s how I was behaving. Like a little girl running away. Not a woman with a whole nation depending on her. When I have sex with you I always feel complete, protected, cherished, wanted needed, desired, appreciated, happy, safe and a million other wonderful things. You always leave me wanting more."

She saw the look of dismay and confusion that crossed his face.

"I?m sorry that came out wrong." She thought a moment, "It?s like eating your favorite meal. You?ve enjoyed it. You?re full. You look forward to the next time you get to..umm" she smiled at him, "?have it.

She put her hands on his face and looked into his eyes.

"Until 4 months ago Obi-Wan Kenobi one thing our marriage never lacked was passion. But grief will cause you to do strange things

 

How true! How true! This is so wonderful, so real!

I liked the part about "Sir Idiot". That's exactly the way married couples treat each other, with little jokes like that.

Do I sense a confrontation between Anakin and Obi-Wan coming up? What's going to happen next? I can't wait to find out!

By the way, Happy Birthday from me, too, even if it is belated.

[This message has been edited by Jane Jinn (edited 02-28-2000).]

 

Jane Jinn it takes being married 12 years to know how married people talk. I've got the story sort of planed out in my head. But sometimes it's hard to get from point A to point B to point C. I was hoping my dialog sounded real.

 

Just passing by, upping threads (ON THE THIRD PAGE!!) that deserve to be crowded with clamoring fans.*
*Okay, what's Anakin going to do?
** R U Sidious, you do a great job of portraying the chemistry between Kenobi and the Queen.

 

Yes, and the crowd is clamoring for more Anakin now.
(And I hope it wasn't the *f-word* OB1 had to face his mother-in-law about for using in front of his son.. )

 

Obi-Wan leaned his forehead against Amidala?s and whispered, "I know."

Amidala?s comlink beeped. "Yes, Sabe."

"Your Majesty you wanted to know when it was time to dress for the banquet. And Master Yoda would like Master Obi-Wan to contact him."

Amidala sighed, "Thank you. I?ll be in my dressing room in 15 minutes." They spent a few more precious minutes not speaking just standing close to each other.

When they married the Naboo government had allowed Amidala to expand the Queen?s Quarters into the guest chambers next to them. It gave her a space for a dressing room / office. And it solved the problem of her handmaidens and other staff walking in on the newlyweds. Usually at a most intimate moment. They had built a room for little Qui-Gon?s there too. Little Qui-Gon , it would be so easy to just think of him as living at the Temple. Where she could go see him. He had lived at the Temple for 5 years before he died. Amidala had a teenage cousin who had died when Amidala was a child. For the last 20 years her aunt claimed he was away at school. Except for being dusted by a house keeping droid his room was as he left it. "Simon doesn?t like his things touched while he is away." Amidala could her aunt?s voice. Aunt Renee?s life was normal in every other aspect. She just couldn?t admit to herself or anyone else that her son had died. It made the situation sadder.

Amidala didn?t think anyone realized how closely she had come to stepping over that line. After the miscarriage she was extremely week. She hadn?t wanted to live with her children gone. In her depression she thought her husband would never want to see her again. She had nothing to live for. Every time she awoke she would think "When I get well I?ll go see little Qui-Gon at the Temple." Then she would see his little body on the funeral pyre and remember. "My sweet baby boy died" It was like losing him all over again each time.

When Obi-Wan brought Anakin to Naboo to be treated he was near death. Anakin had had some kind of vision that Amidala was dead. He refused to go into the bacta to be healed. If Amidala was dead he didn?t want to live. The only way Obi-Wan had been able to keep Anakin alive was to promise him that Amidala was all right. Once they got to Naboo Anakin still would not to go into the bacta. He insisted on seeing "his Padme". Obi-Wan came to see her. The healers refused to let her go to him. Amidala begged Obi-Wan to take her to Anakin. Obi-Wan wrapped her in blankets and carried her to Anakin. The minute Anakin saw her he accepted treatment. Amidala was only out of bed a few minutes. Yet she was exhausted from the small effert. As Obi-Wan carried her back to her room she fell asleep. When she awoke Obi-Wan had left for Coruscant. But her concern for Anakin had brought her back from the brink. She owed Anakin her sanity. She would have to tell Obi-Wan someday.

"Ami, I wish you didn?t have to go."

"Me too. But it would be taken as a breach in protocol if the Queen of the Naboo did not to show up at a dinner in honor of the Chancellor. Do you think Master Yoda has another mission for you?"

"Probably."

They went back into the living room. A storage crate Amidala had been too distracted to notice caught her eye.

"What?s this?"

"Oh that, Panaka sent it over this morning. Said he didn?t want to be around when you opened it."

Amidala opened the crate. She stared at the contents. Obi-Wan just looked at the floor.

"When I lost control, I?m afraid your wardrobe suffered too. It?s amazing what a light saber will do to fabric. Especially when there is metal in the fiber."

Amidala picked up what you could call the shreds of a dress. "Add a some more credits to the cost." She thought.

"This is ? this was one of my favorite costumes. Do you realize how long it took me to put it all together?"

Obi-Wan picked up his light saber. He extended his arm to hand it to her.

"Would you like to destroy something of mine?"

She laughed, "Not really." Looking at the dr

 

A Banquet for the Chancellor? You mean Palpy?
So, is good ole Palpy going to come and do his usual thing...namely, muddy the waters? Ah, another interesting turn in an interesting story.

 

Hi, this is to let everyone know that I've decided to change the story a little by making my 3 main caractors 5 year older. Amidala will be 29, Obi-Wan 40 and Anakin 25. Amidala and Obi-Wan will have been married for 10 years and little Qui-Gon will have been 6 when he died. I wont have to change that much in editing except numbers. the things that will change in the story are that Anakin would now be the same age as Qbi wan when he recieved his knighthood, and the problem of Amidala and Obi-wan will have been going on for 3 years instead of 2. I just seems to fit better with the story. Anyone who's not married will have to trust me on this there is a difference between being married 5 years and 10 More histroy you don't want to lose. Especially if the marriage has been good. Also this makes Anakin suffer his unrequited love another 5 years before he does any thing with "his Padme".

 

The story about little Qui-Gon says a bad word is actually a story about me and my dad. When I was 3 1/2 I stayed over night with friends of my parents. The next morning we were going to the store and her car wouldn't start. I told her that when our car didn't start my daddy said Sh-- she looked at me in shock. The next time she turned the key the car started just like I knew it would. My dad was 38 at the time he had know the woman of the couple at least since high school if not grade school. She let him know what she thought about what he said in front of little girls. The wierd thing is that I have an older sister and brother. Evedently they had never repeater Dad's favorite word. Especialy in front of a nice Christian lady.

[This message has been edited by R U Sidious (edited 03-03-2000).]

 

Just discovered this great story. Keep it up. Can't wait to find out what happens next!

 

Just discovered this great story. Keep it up. Can't wait to find out what happens next!

 

I eagerly await your next post! Please keep it up!

 

I'm trying to delete a double post.

[This message has been edited by R U Sidious (edited 03-04-2000).]