Making a RPG

Hey im making a rpg and I just want to know what the people think of the story so far.

It is still a rough version though.


There will be a guy who calls himself tyrael (can't think of an other name yet...) He says he is a jedi trained by a jedi master who recently passed away. Luke takes him under his wing (checking his abilities and stuff) and after a while he gets in the council cause of his amazing force abilities and wisdom.

Tyrael get an apprentice...bla bla bla

Once they fight the Yuuzhan Vong they get outnumbered and just go for a hyperjump, Some ships won't make it and they come across the planet of Korriban ( which is uncharted in the official galaxy map)

At first he thinks it is a dead planet but readings say it has a huge resource of ( insert material here) He builds a colony on there and heself gets manipulated by the ghost of a decieved sith lord called Malak without knowing it...He gets in conflict with the jedi council and stuff. He decides to found his own jedi academy. The jedi council doesn't agree off course. But with the wisdom of Tyrael he will get the people behind him thus making Luke skywalker to allow him to found his own academy.

He promises the people that he will get rid of the Vong once and for all as long as he gets funded ( by that time he already has plans for a mixture of a droid and human army plus ships etcetera)

NOTE: These ideas all come from the manipulation of Malak.

after a month his first Starforger is ready and a 50.000 ground troops and a flight squadron. It shows that they are better then the X wings and other fighters. After a succesfull battle against the Yuuzhan Vong more systems start to join him including Corellia who gives him the most funding.

The Galactic Alliance and the (insert name here) are working together to fight off the yuuzhan vong. The yuuzhan vongs most important leaders get killed.You know what happens when a race like the Yuuzhan Vong loses a leader...

After all this Tyrael keeps expanding his army and the students at his academy also getmanipulated by the spirits of old sith lords long gone.


Well I need a free host and stuff, im still working on a website and this will be played on a messageboard.

I still need to write little details and stuff. Give more background about the Padawan from Tyrael and stuff.. I hope you guys like it

 

Sorry for this double post..

I just would like to know what kind of books would be helpful for me if I want to maintain the rpg.

 

*bump* Does no one like this story?

 

Where do the player characters fit into this story?

 

Well just as in every rpg story i guess...Players can either be at the side of tyrael, or the galactic alliance.. or they can be a smuggler etcetera...They don't have to have a big role but i'll try to give everyone a shot at something important in this story.

Can you give me any comments about the story?

 

It strike me that Tyrael is the central protagonist in your story... so as asked above, what are the heroes for?

The heroes are the central point in your game, generally the story should be built around the heroes, not vice versa.

So don't decide too much stuff before you get your players. I mean, when george Lucas was running his A New Hope Star Wars game, he wasn't able to write half his plot until he realised the players wanted to be a farmboy, a smuggler, a princess and a wookiee... was he?

 

I know, but still... The bad guy is mostly in the center since he does all the bad stuff...He will be a NPC.


The heroes in the story will get to do things like..space battles, infiltration missions... Ground war. Or many other stuff. It depends on what they want to be

 

That's where I suggest you start.

Divide your story up into blocks, each block should contain a major event... right?

Then make each block a movie, complete with a opening scrawl of what has occurred before. Then run the game like it's a movie, remember each one of these movies needs some action, some character development etc, etc...

Your back-story seems basically firm, but you need to come up with a future storyline that's full of adventure, excitement and really wild things. And decide before you start the game whether you want the players to be on the Good Side or the bad side, but as you're playing Star Wars, I would strongly suggest the good side only.

 

Yeah I know. Those are my plans I just want to know what people think of the story..

 

The one thing that a GM learns at some point in his/her gaming carrier is never have a story already planed out. I don't know how many times I have planned a 50-60 hour mission only to have the PCs solve it in an hour and a half. The PC is a very tricky creature. Never become too attached to a story line. Now there is always the illusion of free will, where the players think they are making a desission, but no matter what dessision they make, the same thing will happen. Example, the Movie with the now govener of Cal. The Running Man. Arnold is in a hellicopter, scoping out a riot. He is ordered to fire on the crowd. He choses not to, he is clubed in the head and the co-pilot fires and it is blamed on him. If he would have chosen to go ahead and follow orders, the same thing would have happened. People would have died and he would be imprisoned. He had the illusion of free will. If you are set that that is the way you want your story to go, use lots of illusions of free will to convince the players that they have a say in how the story is progressing.

 

but this will be a rpg without stats and stuff and played in a messageboard.

And those stuff I listed are just a couple of main events basicly.. there is a lot of space between those occurences

 

But don't forget to reward them for doing smart stuff! And sometimes, the illusion must be given up for true free will. Just aim to know your own players so well that you can predict which was they will jump, and plan for that...

But anyway, back to your question. I quite like the story,you need to fill out those parts that you've left with (insert name here) because that makes it a bit hard to follow (I do it all the time in my game notes).

It looks set up for an epic conflict, but where do you want it to go? What's your aim with this story. Remember, no matter how lovely your back story is, it's what happens in the game that matters. I have a friend who once wrote out a 100 page background for a fantasy game with waring gods and complex plots, but unfortunately the sessions were dull as dishwater and we didn't care how epic the back story was.

 

but this will be a rpg without stats and stuff and played in a messageboard.

And those stuff I listed are just a couple of main events basicly.. there is a lot of space between those occurences

OK, ignore everything I said, what I was talking about applies to pen 'n' paper RPGs. I've never really played message board games, I prefer a small group of flesh and blood gamers.

So I can't really give you any critique on how your background will work in such a game. Good luck.

 

but this will be a rpg without stats and stuff and played in a messageboard

That just makes it easier for the PCs to mar your story. No stats = much harder for GM to justify why PC can't do something. If you have stats and dice it is always (illusion of free will again) easy to tell them to make a check and say they failed, no matter what they roll.


Back to the question, it seem to have a promice. Perhaps the resorce in question could be Mandolorian Iron, so tough even lightsabres can't cut it. And since you will be playing in the NJO era, I would sugest picking up the NJO source book. Even though yours will be MSGBRD RPG the NJO SB has lots of good info on the Vong and their culture and weapons, tactics, etc.

 

Thanks for your comments jedibendu and diver... you two have been really helpful and thanks for all the tips.

But yeah off course even in a messageboard rpg a jedi is better then a mere smuggler so I do have to keep that in mind.

 

That depends on how you define better. A Jedi is not a god. Jedi are different than other classes, just as a soldier is different than a noble, each has their own strengths and weaknesses. As a GM, you would do well to remeber that. You wouldn't want people playing non Jedi characters to feel that they were not as important to the game, because you were skewing everything towards challenging the Jedi.

 

I know.

And off course everyone will be as important.

But i have to keep it real.. I mean a guy like han solo doesn't stand a chance against a sith lord.

off course not every jedi is all powerful no jedi is..a padawan could lose against a smuggler (depends on the training) and a knight and master are better off course but since Jango killed a council member as master and a knight can make mistakes.

 

Remember, if a force user ever gets too uppity, use a Dashade Shadow Killer. They have a natural immunity to the force and were used by both Jedi and Sith during the Hyperspace Wars.

And as far as a Jedi being better than a smugler, just remember the Jedi Code. The Jedi can only use their power to defend, not attack. The smugler tosses a gernade at the Jedi and shoots at him. The Jedi has a choice, catch the gernade, block the blaster bolts, or run away. Now a Sith is a diffrent story. Sith have only one rule, only the strong survive, so the Sith would turn the smugler into charcoal before he got the blaster out of the holster.

 

Exactly... And off course if a jedi attacks and kills someone on purpose without a reason he will get councilled and stuff.

 

Anyway I want to make this a big project instead of another failure like on of my former rpgs.

So if anyone wants to be a part of this project just contact me by aim or msn

AIM: Stephslilteddy
MSN: Arch_Angels_redemption@hotmail.com

And I would like to have a artist who can do concept drawings

Thanks in advance

 

Oh, so you are the guy wjho's been trying to rteach me on MSN, I'll stop deleting your incoming requests, then...

 

Lol, I was already wondering if you had gotten my e mail.

 

*bump*

 

*bump*

 

There is no need to up a thread that is not even half way down the first page.