Before - Legends "Not-So-Much-Fate" (Humor, Marysue Parody, Qui, Dooku) ---The fic that wouldn't die! Updated--1/3!

I found this through the Quotes thread in Resource, and once I read the first chapter, I couldn't stop! Amazing story and absolutely hilarious! Charm is so idiotic and annoying, sometimes I just want to slap her silly (wait, she already is), yet I just have to know what she does next. Hmm, is this an entirely sane thought process?

Anyway, great job so far, and I can't wait to hear more about Charm's SW adventure. I'm certain she's going to end up making the universe spontanteously combust. Mary-Sues always have to go out in style.

 

Lovely Fic you've got here. Funny too.

Your Mary Sue doesn't seem too Mary Sue to me

If you've got a PM list please put me on it

 

Giving this amazing fic a bump in hopes for another post

 

Oh well. My feelings were hurt. I wasn?t above a little assault and petty thievery.

I promptly kneed Dooku in the crotch, grabbed his wallet and ran for my life.

I love this. I read it all in one go and now my sides hurt. More soon?

*looks hopeful*

-DS

 

Aw, thank you so much!

Actually, I've been working a lot on the next chapter. We'll have some gueststars.

I don't want to name an exact date I'll have it up by, because that always seems to doom me not to have it by then, but it should be soon.

 

*pouts* where's the rest of it?

This is some seriously funny work. You would not BELIEVE my weekend so far. Then Layren pointed me in this direction, since I'm new to the boards and not quite sure where to start, and she knew I needed a giggle.

I believe I have almost fallen on the floor about 5 times. Wholly inappropriate behavior on the part of a main character will do that to you, I suppose. This is just.....what can I say? It's genius.

Loving it so far, can't wait to see more!

 

This...was...hysterical!
So there I was, innocently following a trail of hyperlinks around the boards, when I stumbled upon this story. And since Qui/Dooku and parodies are two of my all-time favorite things, I decided to take a look.
I...ah...oh, where to begin? This whole thing was hilarious! Charm is...an interesting lifeform, to say the least. She seems sort of perpetually sugarhigh and overcaffienated, all at once. My favorites were her stunning comebacks, such as "Your face is irrational!" The mind-suggestion-induced babbling when Qui sent her to get the comlink was absolutely priceless. And ohhhh, something tells me that she's going to regret injuring poor Dooku and stealing his wallet....
And yet...I like Charm. Her perspective on things is so funny, as is the banter between her, Qui and Dook. Those poor Jedi don't know what hit them.
This really did brighten up my day, and I'd love to see an update soon. *coughhintcough*
Great job. Keep up the good work!

 

I'm baaaaaaaaaaack! I remember! I remember! ;D

Nice one, there.

 

Gah--I'm sorry, I'm so very terrible at updating this fic. I have had so many lovely comments on it lately though, that I supposed tonight I should clean up and at least post what I have thus far. This chapter isn't my favorite part of the story (the best is yet to come? ) but it carries along some trademark madness, and hopefully will be a good kickoff to a better posting year 2007. I really, really appreciate your continued readership, though. Thank you guys so very much.

PS: Guest-starring in this chapter are the ever lovely classic Qui Obi author Athena Leigh and everyone's favorite Qui-whumping, OC-totin' Layren. *grin* Thank you for your indulgences, ladies.

-##-

I don?t know if my kick really did any good.

The thought crossed my mind somewhere between the air and the floor as I leapt for escape--that Dooku was a Jedi Master, possibly the best in the Order, future Sith, genuinely hardcore, and as such, he could probably take a kick, even one strategically placed, better than most. I may yet be doomed. That and the fact that he had kind of jerked away as a kicked, so I wasn?t even sure if I had hit anything?

Well, anything incapacitating.

The random surprise of violence had been enough to get the wallet away from him though, and that was the real prize. I clung to the little package tightly as I fled, shrieking wildly. I could hear people all around me; Rodians, Twi?lek, Wookies, and all manner of smokescreen for my brilliant dash. I twisted between merchants and travelers, up a stairway, and then back down in an effort to lose the inevitable pursuers.

I formed a plan as I ran for when Dooku did eventually catch me. I would somehow procure Qui-Gon?s lightsaber (possibly with another crotch kick) and challenge the Master to a duel right there in the spaceport. That would be an excellent way to prove my talents as a future Jedi. To prove him wrong! I would probably beat him, even.

At a certain point, I glanced over my shoulder. Surprisingly, Dooku and his pansy-knickered apprentice were nowhere in sight. I blinked. Wait a minute. What, was I not even worth chasing down?

As I regarded the Jedi-less spaceport, it seemed that I wasn?t.

Worth chasing down, that is.

Fine.

Fine! I could cope. I?d always been good at coping. As I slowed to a walk, a thrilling feeling of independence came over me. I had a handful of money-even if I didn?t know exactly how much, or what currency it was-and my own wits. And I was in a freaking cool space port. The galaxy was at my fingertips, even more so than it had been back on Earth when I bought that Guide to Planets book! I could go anywhere, from Naboo, to Serenno, to all those little obscure planets on the outer rim! Where ever I wanted to go, I had absolute freedom. So what if Qui-Gon and Dooku had ditched me? They were losers anyway. On the spot, I broke into a rousing chorus of American Idol Kelly Clarkson?s hit song, ?Miss Independence.?

?What happened to Miss Independence, no longer-uh-something-something?to be dependant!? I sang loudly, skipping through the space port, ducking aliens and furry things. Now all I had to do was decide where to go! I tried to remember my Star Wars geography... where to go, where to go?

Suddenly, there was a little pop, and the faint smell of rice krispy treats. I whirled to see a winged mini-person perched delicately on my shoulder.

I gasped, as the voice of the famous Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan fanfiction author, Athena Leigh, popped into my head. ?Charm, no! You?re getting lost. Look at a map, or ask someone for help.? Her voice was strained, and she sounded worried. ?You?re going to get yourself killed at this rate...go back and apologize to Qui-Gon and Dooku, and see if they won?t help you find your way.?

I stared at her in shock, taking in her white Jedi robes and perfect golden halo. ?You?re my shoulder angel?!? I chewed my lip thoughtfully and stared at the tiny w

 

Oh goodness, I had just about given up hope on ever seeing this updated and lo and behold, a new year's surprise!

Jess that was hysterical!!!

he weird thing was that she looked a lot like the infamous fanfictional legend Layren, in dark robes. What was more was she had a little Jedi-torturing whip. Clearly, she was an angst writer.


She swung her devil tail casually. ?If I were you, I?d go to one of the pirate outposts. Then you can become a pirate queen, and eventually kidnap Qui-Gon and Dooku and make them pay for what they did to you, with the dumping and all.?

?A pirate queen!?? I squealed, leaping up and down with glee.

That sounds like a fabulous idea Tell her to give Kyran and the triad my regards if you run into them You are so awesome m'dear and Athenaness attacking first isn't very angelic like Then again, I rock better than her so myeh on her I'll get her back for that one

 

[clamps hands over eyes and groans] Oh, no?

Is she just stupid?

[peeks out between fingers] Actually, she seems to be reminding me?just a little?of Bella from that vampire book Twilight. [flinches] ?I said a little. [face_sheepish]

-Misti

 

An update!! It's strange because I was just thinking about this story a few days ago.

Her voice was high and shrill, and upon hearing the sound of it, I felt very much that somewhere, back on Earth, Qui-Gon was being tortured in a fanfic.

I loved the little "angel/devil" argument, and it's so fitting that the devil should be an angst writing, Jedi-torturer. Charms is going to Coruscant?? Hurry, sound the alarm! Evacuate the Temple!

It was a map, a nice one of those ?you are here? things that they often have in airports, malls and at Walt Disney World.

*snorts* Yes, Disney World is famous for those things.

I hope you update soon! For some morbid reason, I want to see the havoc Charm sets loose on Coruscant.

 

wow. that totally rocked!!! i love Charm! (how can i love a Mary Sue!?!) hilarious!

 

Woohoo! An update!

So what if Qui-Gon and Dooku had ditched me? They were losers anyway. On the spot, I broke into a rousing chorus of American Idol Kelly Clarkson?s hit song, ?Miss Independence.?

?What happened to Miss Independence, no longer-uh-something-something?to be dependant!? I sang loudly, skipping through the space port, ducking aliens and furry things. Now all I had to do was decide where to go! I tried to remember my Star Wars geography... where to go, where to go?

Great, now you've got me singing that...

Bwahahah! Your very own personal shoulder-angels! My friend and I just saw The Emperor's New Groove, and then we started talking about shoulder-Jedi and shoulder-Sith, respectivley. Having them as Athena and Layren was so funny (and appropriate, too).

Uh-oh. Charm's going to Coruscant? This can only lead to disaster. I can't wait to see what happens!

Nice work, as always. If you've got a running PM list, would you add me? Thanks, and keep it up!

 

This fic is awesome! I think this is one of the best parodies I've ever read regarding Mary Sues... Could I be added to a PM list? Please? Great work so far!

 

Surely one must credit Dooku's exceptional Jedi training and control for the fact that he didn't actually strangle this woman. . Qui-Gon is young and too kind-hearted, but even he must have thought of it. But her narrative is so funny! She is a true embarrassment to all fandom and with her own thought-entities to get her into more trouble ... now loose in the candy store of the GFFA. With Dooku's wallet. And heading for the Temple.

I want Jedi ice cream.

 

Best. Line. Ever.