Beyond - Legends Speed Painting & Speeding Salad (Kaleesh OC's, OC challenge response)

Title: Speed Painting & Speeding Salad

Author: Kecen

Timeframe: Somewhere before the NJO books

Characters: Farand Ola Duvall (albino Kaleesh from port city), Nass Sirind Duvall (russet Kaleesh from the sun belt)

Genre: light-hearted vignette

Keywords: Kaleesh, folk tale, Ortolan, art contest, Imperial remnant

Summary: Farand Ola and Nass Sirind, two Kaleesh philosophlangers (two ?scientists? trying to prove their intelligent creator is an idiot for making them sentient) quarrel about with one of their stories has a better moral.

Notes: I have no idea how the Imperial remnant would treat the Kaleesh. It?s wishful thinking they study them for kicks and bring fruit baskets of peace because they want to set up a military outpost on Kalee.

This story was done as a contest entry for the Essential Guide to OC?s.

Nass Sirind & Farand Ola

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?There were once two swordsmen,? spoke Nass Sirind with her scaly russet hands folded into her navy blue uniform, striped with white. She resembled an oldtime nun of human civilizations still flourishing somewhere in the stars, but moved in a manner befitting an avian filter-feeder.

Farand Ola, her diminutive colleague, trembled on the wood perch in anticipation. If she had wanted to, the floor would have made an excellent litter box. But she would wait, for patience was always valued in a Kaleesh philosophlanger, who tested the intelligence in creation.

?One from the village of Elapine in the desert mesas, the other from Sisindine in the adjacent white-sand beaches. Full of tokin crabs.?

At the thought of torus-shaped crustaceans, Farand Ola clacked her pale beak and began to scratch her back. Halfway undone, the navy blue robe of office hung loosely over her breathing spiracles. A pair of periwinkle-blue eyes darted to the wall behind the dark-skinned program director of house Duvall?s carcass gardens and study of tokin crabs.

?Are you still listening?? Nass Sirind stared at her student with scrutiny.

?Yes,? a twitter of reply.

?Both were very happy with their lives, although living in the desert was a harsh lot, and the open sea was home to many unsavory creatures, excluding tokin crabs, of course.

When the weather allowed, after petaltide, members of the two respective villages would trek out to a mountain pass at dusk to trade goods. It was good, for both sides could bring morsels to the market that the other wanted. The desert is full of scampers and precious minerals. The sea has its tokin crabs and lance-fish.

It just so happened that the two swordsmen met each other on one of these market days. Both had wives who were traders, and it seemed an act of goodwill to follow them for this outing.?

Nass Sirind pondered her next sentence as Farand Ola interjected.

?Good opportunities for women?.hrrrr, civilization.? she snorted.

?Yes, but of course I don?t feel oppressed, as the Imperials put it.

They decided to make salads, as was the masculine thing to do.

The first swordsman, the one from Sisindine, hastily gutted a few scampers and spiced them.

The second swordsman, the one from Elapine, objected. He was an old, wise man with graying plumage and spots everywhere. Like an aged tokin crab has. He thought that a salad should be made slowly, with love and care.

The first trader scoffed at this statement, pointing out that gutting helpless vermin was an act of violence that wouldn?t benefit from careful, methodical knife work. He started tossing rhuba leaves into the mix, and then proceeded to splatter dressing everywhere, even on the other swordsman.

Next came the Elapine swordsman?s turn to make a salad.

He took a great long three hours to finish laying each leaf piece by piece, and by then his family had already eaten their evening meal. It was soup the other swordsman made, too! With shellfish and

 

Never have I wanted salad so much in my life. But not the vegetarian one. I want them crabs. Oh, that sounds bad.Perching kaleesh could tecnically use the litter box but they like to scratch around in them a little......

 

I sure hope the salad and the litter are washable with biodegradable detergent :B

 

I like how the crabs kept popping up over and over again. Nicely done!

 

!

I slapped those on to try and be funny, since my entry was done on such short notice. Ah well, it was worth the effort (although the other entries will probably beat mine).

I checked your fanfiction record. I'm honoured :B

 

That was priceless... I enjoyed that thoroughly...

The younger impatience is matched in the salad story by our "listeners" - and then has the all to talk about speed painting. Just priceless!

What a fun entry, and inventive OCs too!

 

Now, what about speed dating?

*one more story to review*

 

Very cool story! The philosophlanger is an interesting concept, and I think you did a great job with the Kaleesh. Writing aliens is difficult, and you did it well.

I also liked all the tokin crab references.


He had another carefully planned out painting, but he was too frustrated to finish it, and nothing was working. In a final fit of rage, he took a whole can of paint and started sloshing it over his painting of talking avocado trees relaxing on the beach.

I can totally empathize with that feeling.

Great work!

-Thumper

 

I'm going to expand on the philosophlangers in a non-Star Wars setting if I can. They are a bit of a metaphor in a metaphor in a metaphor. Aliens are a breeze in the SWU, actually. Their appearance coats any human habits in alienation :B

 

Hilarious story... you deserve a tokin for your good work... preferably one in a crustacean-shape...

 

?And you think my story had bad morals??

?Yours was inconclusive. Mine is ironic.? Farand Ola cheerfully answered, saluting her elder.

Cute story! The two main characters bantered well, and I enjoyed the way that you told both of the ?tales?.

Wonderful piece of work!

 

teehee! Thanks for the comments. I didn't exactly expect the amount of feedback I've gotten...

Farand Ola's line about why her story is better is actually my favorite part. The Tokin crabs are a bit of a knod to Vonduun crabs and Lumiya (Farand Ola has a few Sith Lady costumes).